When I actually think about it, I think this is the first episode of Xplosion I've ever watched. I download and watch a lot of the matches from the show and some are pretty damn good like Samoa Joe Vs. Puma from earlier this year, but I don't recall ever watching the full show. To sum it up though, it's basically like RAW AM with different hosts and an exclusive match each week. They show segments and matches in their entirety from iMPACT! the night before, but have Shane Douglas & Jeremey Borash kicking around some ideas as well as that exclusive match I mentioned, which is normally for the X Division.
The new "This is TNA" video played followed by a nice video for Xplosion which had tons of little screens all showing action shots of TNA before revealing the logo. Shane Douglas & Jeremy Borash were then shown and they pumped up the show with Hangman's Horror and then the two started talking about the Ultimate X match coming up on PPV. Douglas said that the greatest tag teams in the world are in TNA and while that's horribly false, it's also painfully obvious that TNA's tag team division kicks WWE's ass while stealing its lunch money. They talked about the experience of Konnan and the brute force of the champions going up against the aerial offense of Daniels and Styles, and then Borash brought up the Fan's Revenge match and how we will get more information on that later. Following that, they showed the tag team bout between AJ Styles & Christopher Daniels and Kazarian & Maverick Matt from iMPACT! which started up that show. Since I literally just reviewed iMPACT!, I won't bother repeating myself though it was a pretty decent match. They threw in a commercial break just like on last night's show and then the rest of the match followed by the Eric Young, Larry Zybsko, and Jeff Jarrett segment with Jarrett just running them down came on. The second commercial break then aired and we came back to Jeremy talking about Jarrett surrendering at the PPV due to the situation. Douglas piped up saying that fans are getting too involved nowadays anyway (huh?) and now they can bring straps into the ring and it's bogus. Borash then pumped up how Cornette was left with no other options because of all Jarrett has down. They then hyped up the video contest (I pray Kent Jones submits and wins) and Douglas claimed he loved the fans and there's nothing wrong with being a moron. Kind of a weird segment actually. After this, it was finally time for an original match.
Singles Match
Petey Williams Vs. Shark Boy
Wow, remind me to thank the person who recommended this match to me via e-mail for such a monumental waste of time. This was nothing. Shark Boy came out and the announcers called him a cult favorite which was TNA talk for a face jobber who we rarely see. That should have been the tip-off to me that this was going to suck. They started it off actually well with some good back and forth chain wrestling until Shark Boy hit a shoulder block off the ropes. Shark Boy then stopped before being nailed with a sloppy monkey flip (looked more like he was never going to take the bump) and kicked Williams' gut. Shark Boy then spun out of a hip toss and walked right into a slap, but then delivered one of his own right to Williams and then hit an atomic drop. He then went for the butt bite on Williams, but Williams ducked out of the ring and I'm fairly sure he spit at Shark Boy as I saw a wad of something go flying. Whatever it was, it prompted Shark Boy to come-a-running which fell into Williams' typical game plan allowing him to get the "cult favorite" on the defensive with some stomps. Shark Boy made a quick comeback with a roll-up and then the butt bite which Petey escaped and the crowd could visibly and audibly care less. Shark Boy then delivered a slingshot plancha to Williams on the outside as we headed to a commercial break and Mike Tenay was incredible here as they tried to cut to break during the move. "Going to take a commercial break, but wait a minute, watch this! Don't cut away to the break, watch that move by Shark Boy...now you can go to the commercial break." God, it was like he was literally guiding the production team by the hand.
Commercial break number three has me wondering why I bothered downloading and watching this show. Thank you for recommending this "good" show to me, Peter.
We came back as Shark Boy went for a very sloppy sunset flip, but Petey countered it and hit his leg drop across the apron. He then pushed him into the ring and hit a suplex into a rear chin lock with the left arm looked. Shark Boy, who I really normally enjoy (especially his gauntlet match with Daniels last year), looked horrible in this match particularly around this point when he got out of the hold. They eventually made it up to the top rope and started going at it with Shark Boy hitting a hurricanrana. They went back and forth some more from there and then Shark Boy, completely unmotivated (and who wouldn't be on Xplosion?), hit some clotheslines and then a face plant to his knee followed by a big DDT which was probably the spot of the match for me, yet again, the crowd could visibly and audibly care less. I know this is just Xplosion, but this is making TNA look horrible by comparison. Shark Boy then mounted Williams in the corner for some punches and then the face bite as Don West tried to sell it as a psychologically damaging move. Yep, a psychologically damaging move. Let that line sink in for a bit. The spot isn't bad or anything, but West's not Gordon Solie and Shark Boy's not that great so I don't even think West should be. Anyway, Williams then hit the tilt-a-whirl into the Russian leg sweep and started reeling him in for the Destroyer. He went for it, but Shark Boy countered it by just dropping Williams straight on the back of his neck for a big nearfall which finally woke up the crowd. Shark Boy then went for the Dead Sea Drop (Diamond Dust, my all time favorite move), but Williams raked the eyes to get out of it. As Shark Boy jumped off top to hit Williams, Williams then nailed him in the gut and hit the Canadian Destroyer for the win to this pretty bad match.
Winner: Petey Williams
Star Wrestler: Petey Williams
I can't believe I was duped into thinking Petey Williams and Shark Boy had a freakin' good match on Xplosion when they couldn't even do it on a PPV. The fact that Petey Williams was the star of this match tells you every last thing you need to know.
Commercial break number four says I'll probably never be watching Xplosion in its entirety again.
Back from break, they showed the Alex Shelley Vs. Chris Sabin match from the night before which was decent, but could/should have been so much better. Of course, it ended in what's probably nowhere near the last of the Jackass spots. They basically played this whole thing as it was on iMPACT! and then showed the Christian Cage and Rhino video package which was good and personal, though nowhere near the level of the Samoa Joe and Scott Steiner video package. We then went to a commercial again and came back to the horror of a match that was Hangman's Horror. I still can not get over how third-rate the whole feud, match, segment, turn, et cetera came off. They threw a commercial in there as well and then showed the finish and Runt's turn that no one cared about. The Bobby Roode & Colonel Parker video played next followed by the town hall segment with Larry Zybsko, Jim Cornette, Samoa Joe, Jeff Jarrett, and some unlucky "fan." That was it. No, seriously; that was it. Nothing more and nothing less.
Well, that was pointless. The only credible reason I'd see someone watching this show would be to cut out all the bullshit from iMPACT! like when I watch RAW AM in lieu of RAW. However, they didn't cut much, if anything, from the show here so there's really no reason to watch it all, even if you want to see the occasional good match. Trust me, if it's that good, it will be on the 'net to download or on some DVD in the future. Otherwise, save yourself the trouble. If iMPACT! moves to two hour, Xplosion will instantly server a better purpose, but as it stands, it's iMPACT! with some more PPV pumping and another bad match, though nowhere near the level of Hangman's Horror.
God, I can't believe I just reviewed two recap shows and now it's time for SmackDown! so I know my good mood won't get fixed. Screw this, I'm going to catch up on Pro Wrestling NOAH from June and put off SmackDown! for an hour; at least I'm guaranteed two or three good matches there. 'Till next time guys, this is "Squared Circle Reviews" signing off and hoping you enjoy what you watch, as long as it's not an utterly pointless show.
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