RAW opened up with the normal WWE video followed by a solemn moment of silence for 9/11 which wasn't really silent thanks to the crowd. The USMC Color Guard then came out to present the colors as Lillian Garcia sang the national anthem against shots of the flag, WWE overseas, and other patriotic images. As the song ended, we saw a shot of the twin towers from heaven and a big USA chant to cap it off. Very tasteful segment and pretty much what I expected. For some reason, I just didn't expect to find any normal WWE bullshit on this show. Of course, the Irwin line last week didn't do much to back me up on this, but still. Not wasting any time at all, Ric Flair then sauntered his way down to the ring in a bright pink robe and we got a pretty weird opening match.
Ric Flair Vs. Umaga
Why weird? Because it's freakin' Umaga taking on Ric Flair again opening up RAW. What are they even doing with Ric Flair after Summerslam? Is he even going to be at Unforgiven? Well, at least the match was fun for what it was. Flair took it to Umaga right off the bat with an eye rake and then some good ol' Flair chops. Umaga dusted him off, but Flair flew right back at him with a shoulder block, which didn't really work. Flair was a man-on-a-mission tonight as he popped back up and hit a chop block followed by some more chops. Of course, none of this was working, but it was pretty sweet to just watch Flair run with it. Umaga then grabbed Flair and went for the Spike as Estrada jumped on the apron, but as the ref got distracted, it was time for Flair to get down and dirty with two low blows and then a crotch punt. As the ref figured out the match was still going on. Flair hit more chops and some great punches to Umaga, but Umaga tossed away Flair like he was nothing...which is pretty much how WWE feels about him these days. On the outside, Flair got overly pissed off and grabbed a chair before hopping back into the ring. He hit two hard chair shots...well, one hard and one weak, but the second hard one was pretty sweet especially with it followed by Umaga selling it and slamming down the chair like he's New Jack wanting some Sprite. Oh, in all the confusion, the ref apparently called for the bell so Umaga won via DQ or something.
Winner: Umaga
Star Wrestler: Ric Flair
Flair was just going full blown at this point. It would have been great to see what would have happened if it went longer, but I don't think they could have done much else without making Flair look ridiculously weak or killing the aura of Umaga. For what it was, I really enjoyed this and it definitely opened up RAW pretty well.
After the bell rang, Ric Flair got on the outside and grabbed the steel steps to slam Umaga with, but Umaga, being a pissed off monster, just swatted them away...kind of...and then picked them up and slammed them down to show he means business. Flair then hit another chop, but Umaga hit a shot to the neck and finally gained the advantage. It's really hard to believe that Flair basically had Umaga on the defensive this whole time but also kind of cool. Umaga then picked up Flair like he was nothing (again) and then nailed a Samoan drop to the outside because...well, again it's WWE and Flair has to be fodder for any newcomer for some reason. Umaga then tossed another steel step set into the ring, but Kane's music hit and a pissed off Red Machine made his way down. Kane hopped into the ring and they traded blows until Kane nailed the uppercut and got the upper hand. Umaga then did the same and went for the Spike, but Kane grabbed him for the chokeslam. Umaga powered out of it and then hit a nice belly to belly suplex as Estrada handed him a chair. Umaga nailed Kane on the back and then on the head with it and celebrated with Estrada, but as his back was turned, Kane sat up and then gave a big boot to Umaga. He then laid in two hard chair shots to Umaga that only knocked him out of the ring and down to one knee. Kind of reminded me of the Hardyz trying to take down Lesnar in 2002 except Umaga's...Umaga. He might surpass Lesnar one day, but I doubt it's going to be anytime soon.
A sweet spot then came as Kane tossed the steel steps right at Umaga from inside the ring to the outside. Umaga got his hands up in time and it did look a bit telegraphed, but God damn that was a pretty fun spot. I would have loved to see a bigger bump from Umaga, but considering who is in this segment, I'm getting a lot better than I ever expected. Kane then went outside and slammed the steps on the ramp to scare Estrada back and then Kane pushed Umaga over the barricade. Umaga got up and tried to go after Kane from here, but Kane's pyro/fire went off and threw off Umaga completely as Kane stood tall. This was a pretty cool segment considering it's WWE and had Kane & Umaga. I feel like I'm going to enjoy this RAW a lot more than I should, but since I drop my standards to watch WWE weekly shows, that's not that much of a surprise.
After all that, we get a McMahon segment with Vince and Shane outside walking into Madison Square Garden and Vince said it's the Walk Of Fame and you have to be someone special to be apart of the walk. They listed some names like Muhammad Ali, Walt Frazier, Carl Lewis, and even Larry Bird which awakens the old Celtics mark inside me. Of course, this is all just build-up to Vince's idea of the biggest name on the walk...Vince McMahon. Of course, it's marked off for emphasis. "No one steps there," said Vince. No one steps on him. Well, if that's how Vince wants to re-write history, let him. Vince then said he has an inkling they will be walking all over DX tonight and it's time to go to work. Typical McMahon segment here. Not bad, but not good enough and all it makes you think is how many more we have to go in this show. For some reason, they then showed Kane leaving the ring which makes me think he just pulled up a chair and watched the segment in the ring with the rest of the crowd. JR and King then hyped up the main event of Triple H & Vince McMahon as well as a Trios match with John Cena, Carlito, & Jeff Hardy going up against Edge, Randy Orton, & Johnny Nitro later. God, none of those sound appealing at all and I have a feeling the best match of the show already happened.
Commercial break number one actually left me optimistic and pessimistic about the rest of the show. I got my hopes as they delivered a good tribute, fun & short match, and then a good Kane-Umaga segment, but then they had Vince & Shane come out and the announcers reminded me of what else is left.
Back from break, they showed a clip of Triple H & Mick Foley in the HIAC from No Way Out 2000 with HHH back dropping Foley through the cage and making a dent in the ring. I guess we'll see about ten more of these throughout the rest of the show to either show the dominance of DX or the brutality of HIAC. Probably the first one.
The NYPD Pipes & Drums band performed for the crowd here and who should come out but the Highlanders. But behind them, in the surprise of the night, comes "Rowdy" Roddy freakin' Piper. This show instantly just jumped up in quality. They make their way to the ring and hop in to deliver a promo. Piper got people to root for the band first off and then a huge Piper chant broke out causing Piper to say he loves them too and he's happy to be back in New York. He then said that he was waltzing down 8th Street and saw a magazine rack with the 51 Worst Offenders In WWE History magazine. Of course, Piper's numero uno. Quick side-note: why the hell would anyone buy this new magazine? I got a chance to browse through it in CVS the other day and I couldn't believe how mind-numbingly stupid it was. This is remembering how moronic the other WWE magazines are as well. I can't fault WWE for making it because people buy it. I can definitely fault those people though. Anyway, Piper's proud as ever about being number one and then he said he's proud to be here with the Highlanders who are the number one contenders. He talked to Rory & Robbie, they exchanged pleasantries, and before they could make a play date, they got over excited and Robbie & Piper started to get into it with their respective names. Shutting him up, Rory slapped Robbie and Piper inquired as to why he did that with Rory just saying that Robbie likes it. Roddy got intrigued by this and delivered a very hard slap to Rory.
From there, the three of them started to trade slaps back and forth to the delight of the crowd. Roddy then said he hasn't had this much fun since he beat up Mr. T, meaning since he sold a punch from T that missed by a mile. From here, the Spirit Squad made their grand entrance. Nicky, of all people, was the one elected to talk here and he said that they were watching and it doesn't matter if they call them kilts or skirts, the simple fact is that Piper, the Highlanders, and even the band were dressed like a bunch of girls. Wow, didn't see that one coming. Piper, of course, made a crack about them being male cheerleaders, but not in the way you'd think as he said tough talk from guys who voluntary replaced their balls with pom-poms. God, I missed Piper. He then said it's been a long time since he had a fight in MSG so he invited them up for a Six Man Tag match. The Squad then made a huddle to figure out what to do and said Piper's on. Piper then ordered the marching band to march their way out & told the Squad to show some respect for the band. The Squad kind of obliges, but looks more scared of the band than anything as we head to a break. It's a great feeling when your Tag Team Champions are scared of a marching band. Good segment though until the Spirit Squad came out. Why? Because it has to be the dumbest decision ever to put Nicky on the mike. They literally picked the worst of the bunch and slapped a mike on him. There's a reason he didn't talk much when he was a caddy for Kerwin White.
Commercial break number two still has me wondering why put Nicky on the mike. You've got Mikey who literally is dripping with charisma (though not workrate) and Doane & Jeter can cut some decent promos as well. I guess I shouldn't be surprised considering all they've done to kill the faction.
Trios Match
Highlanders & Roddy Piper Vs. Spirit Squad
As we came back from break, the match was already underway and Piper had Mikey tied up by the shoulder. He tagged in Robbie who hit a headbutt to the shoulder and continued the work while Piper got into a shouting match with the remaining two cheerleaders on the outside. I guess they want to see who's the manliest out of the bunch: the skirt guys or the cheerleaders. The ref then got distracted by all this and Johnny hit what looked like an Enziguri in the ring to take out Robbie and set up the Morton role. As order restored, Johnny got Robbie's arm in a wrench and he brought him over to the corner to begin a big series of tags. Johnny tagged in Mikey, Mikey worked the arm, Mikey tagged in Johnny, Johnny hit some rights and a running clothesline in the corner, Johnny tagged in Kenney, the two hit a double suplex, Kenny got a two-count, and then Kenny locked on the cobra clutch for a rest hold. Phew! I can't believe the cobra clutch has been relegated to a rest hold move in the E. What a gyp. Robbie didn't stay in the hold long as he broke out and shot himself into the ropes, but Mikey got a kick into the back to keep the advantage in the champions' favor. Mikey tagged in again and Kenny launched him into the air at Robbie for a nice forearm shot. While getting on the apron and heading back to the corner, Kenny then just pushed Robbie nonchalantly down to the mat by the face. Subtlety rules.
Mikey then ran down Robbie some more before the Irishman made it up to his feet and fought with Mikey for control. Mikey then came out with an Irish whip and both guys went for elbows with Mikey's getting the brunt of it. Good ol' Doane is then tagged back in and hit a jumping back elbow. Man, is he going to be a star. You could tell that just by watching his early stuff in OVW. The guy has it all and is only two months older than me! Robbie made another comeback from here and went for the corner, but Kenny caught him and dragged him back to the corner. This face-in-peril spot or sequence or whatever you want to call it is going on way too long. I mean, way too long. Johnny tagged in and continued to work over Robbie who then made another quick move with a sunset flip for two. For revenge, Johnny hit a hard clothesline and then locked in a reverse chin lock as Piper & Rory finally start to get the crowd somewhat into it. Robbie tried to make his way back to the corner after powering out, but Johnny hit an elbow and took out Rory. As he turned around though, Robbie nailed him with a back body drop and Piper was finally tagged in to put the boring face-in-peril phase of the match to rest. Piper went on the hot tag and took down everyone with punches, low blows, and eye pokes galore. Best part had to be Kenny and Piper going at it, which I dug insanely for some reason. Kenny got the upper hand and then charged at Piper, but Piper back body dropped him over the top rope onto the rest of the Squad. In the ring, Johnny then got up and walked right into an eye poke from Piper which allowed the Highlanders to pick him up and hit their reverse suplex off the slingshot giving Piper the chance to make the cover for the win. Better than I thought it would be, but it definitely needed to have a couple of minutes shaved off in the middle especially.
Winners: Highlanders & Roddy Piper
Star Wrestler: Kenny
I love Piper. He's one of my all-time favorites, but he didn't do much in the ring besides the hot tag (or he did a lot during the break, take your pick) and Doane was really the one making the match enjoyable. No doubt in my mind the guy will be the youngest World Champ in WWE History. Will he be ready for it anytime soon? That's anybody's guess.
Todd Grisham was then shown with Melina and Nitro, they plugged the second Trios match, and Grisham asked how Nitro prepared for the match. Nitro states that he's prepared for anything all the time looking like he does. He then wanted to talk about Hardy's press conference/paint drying comment and he blew up saying they are the hottest thing on TV right now. Melina agreed and said that watching paint dry is Mick Foley coming in and talking about things twelve years ago. Melina said it was boring and she's glad she fired him to which Nitro agrees and adds that next time Foley has a Dad crush, talk about something other than starving children. Nitro went on a little bit more from here, but Hardy popped up in the back and started painting up a storm like he just did a line of coke and wants to show the world how he feels. Hardy then stood there marveling at what he did until Nitro turned around to shove him. I really hate shoving in wrestling some times. In situations like this, it comes off as a middle school fight in between classes in the hallway by the cafeteria and I feel like the other jobbers are going to pop up and circle them chanting "Fight! Fight! Fight!" until Vince comes in to break everything up causing everyone else to groan. There have been tons of times where it does work, but if you're that pissed off about something like we are supposed to believe about Nitro, there are tons of things you can do besides a freakin' shove. I shove my fiancee when I'm joking. You don't need to do it against someone you "hate." Anyway, Nitro asked if he thought that's funny and he kicked the painting down. Hardy literally flipped out saying it's his painting and shoved Nitro down. Okay, I'm convinced this is middle school. Nitro is the bully who just tore down the painting of the weird kid who will get voted "Most Likely To Disappear Off The Face Of The Planet" four years later in high school. Hardy then threw a blue and yellow bucket of paint into Nitro and that was it. Words cannot express my disdain for this crap. At least it didn't last long. The announcers then plugged the main event once more and we went to another break.
Commercial break number three has me wondering how long it will take before we get wedgies, Indian burns, and titty twisters in a segment that's supposed to make me care about a match.
The show came back on with a shot of New York, paying tribute to 9/11 some more. Another HIAC video is then shown, this time a highlight of the first ever one from Bad Blood 1997 with Undertaker and Shawn Michaels which is one of my all-time favorite matches. I wish those two could seriously have one more match. I loved all their matches, with the first two being some of Undertaker's all time best.
After this, Edge and Lita made their way out to cut a promo running down New York City. Edge said how tonight marks the final RAW appearance of John Cena and he's going to send him back to where he came from: SmackDown! He said Cena can go back to doing what made him popular in the first place: throwback jerseys and cutting raps. That's actually not that bad of an idea, to be honest. Edge then said he knows it's been a while John's "gotten down with his bad self" and he busted out a rap of his own complete with the outlandish facials & hand gestures. He ran down New Yorkers and said he'll beat Cena in TLC making his career soar while Cena will choke like the Yankees did in 2004. He then put down SmackDown! and King Booker saying going from Edge to him is like going from Lita to a NYC Hooker. Well, one costs you money and (in the case of Edge) the other gains you more money and a big main event run. Edge then said he doesn't lose TLCs (except for the one in the summer of 2001) and the champ will be here next Monday. From here, Randy Orton & Johnny Nitro made their way out and WWE showed a recap of Carlito saving Trish from a spear last week only for Trish to fall to an RKO and Orton leaving mocking Cena. I'm so confused about who's fighting who now.
Commercial break number four has me wondering just why Orton would be leaving mocking Cena, who's feuding with Edge, after he took down Trish, who's feuding with Trish, when he's feuding with Carlito. God, logic in WWE is rarer than personality in TNA.
Back from break, Jeff Hardy made his epileptic entrance and Carlito stumbled down to the ring. I thought he was drunk at first, but then I realized he's just trying to "act" pissed off. Cena then bounced his way down for the reaction of a lifetime as always. The fact that people buy tickets just to boo Cena shows how much of a superstar Cena is. There was a classic shot of a young women bouncing to his song with a guy next to her booing with a thumbs down. I only pray they came together because that would just make life so much sweeter.
Trios Match
Edge, Randy Orton, & Johnny Nitro Vs. Jeff Hardy, Carlito, & John Cena
I actually enjoyed this match a lot more than I should have, especially after I look at everything that happened on paper. The paint brothers started it off and Nitro hit a horrible clothesline or missed one and I can't tell if it was intentional or not, but it definitely made Nitro look like even more of a goof than he normally does. It's like WWE has made a 180 on someone I figured they be shoving down our throats come Summerslam 2007. Nitro then screamed and went after Hardy as Melina distracted him. Nitro then actually looked good as a completely pissed off heel going after Hardy, but then Hardy made a weak comeback followed by his normal high flying offense so it balanced out. Carlito then tagged in and hit a big dropkick as the fans chanted for him. Orton then got in and the two who will meet at Unforgiven went back and forth with Carlito eventually hitting a hard clothesline, some left punches, and a back elbow as the announces name dropped Carlito's dad, Carlos Colon. For some reason, a big Cena chant breaks out. This wouldn't be the last time. Orton got the upper hand and got a quick tag out to Edge by hitting a thumb to the eye of Carlito and Edge then went after the plucky face. Carlito went for a springboard moonsault, but Edge ducked out of it only to fall to a standing Head Scissors for a two count. Cena then tagged in for a big reaction as Edge retreated to the corner and tagged in Orton. Cena gave Edge a death look and then went after Orton with his version of the Fisherman's Suplex. Edge hopped in and then went after Cena hardcore. The two have great chemistry considering the little skill Cena has and the inexperience both have in such a high profile spot. This may just be a sleeper feud of the year, but of course, that's blasphemy considering it has John Cena in it.
Orton hit a big suplex from there and tagged in Nitro who went after the former champ with kicks and rights. Cena, not one to play second fiddle to Johnny freakin' Nitro, then hit a takedown and fought back to a huge mixed reaction. Carlito then tagged in and went after his old rival with a suplex and a cover Nitro kicked out of by grabbing Carlito's hair and pulling it. Wow, that was something cool I'd never expect to see Nitro doing. They then showed Carlos Colon in the audience as Nitro slammed Carlito into the second turnbuckle hard. Orton then tagged in and hit his standing dropkick followed by the two going back and forth while the crowd could care less. All they care about is cheering or booing Cena. Carlito then brought Orton over to Cena who got some shots in and then Hardy tagged in. He tried to clothesline Orton over the top, but couldn't quite do it. Cocaine's one hell of a drug. He actually recovered well by stomping a mud hole into Orton, or rather trying to stomp a mud hole, and then he hit a flying body press somewhat taking Orton down. Orton then hung himself up on the second rope to kill time and Hardy then finally clotheslined him out of the ring. Hardy then went for the Poetry In Motion off of Carlito onto Orton on the outside, but he slipped up and crashed & burned in one of the funniest botches I've ever seen. Compared to Jeff Hardy, Sabu may just be the world's safest wrestler. To show people didn't care about the match and rather just John Cena, not one "You F***ed Up!" chant broke out. This match is actually making me realize just how much better Randy Orton is than he gets credit for and just how much more horrible Jeff Hardy is than he gets credit for. Edge gave Hardy a spear on the outside to set up the Morton spot, I think. Cena then tried to protect his partner from the heel gang and he helps him into the ring as we head to a commercial.
Commercial break number five still finds me laughing at that botch. No, screw that. The word "botch" does not do Jeff Hardy's long list of monumental screw-ups justice.
Returning from the break, Edge had Hardy's leg tied up in some bastardization of a Boston Crab. Hardy wiggled out of it and almost made the tag, but Nitro slid in and took down Hardy. Nitro then worked over Hardy's leg which is some sound strategy considering that's all Hardy has used this whole match and he did crash & burn onto his knee. Hardy tried to make his way out of it and laid in some shots to Nitro's head and then did make it out of the hold by hitting a nice twisting neck scissors. This exchange gave me a lot of hope for their Unforgiven match. Orton then hopped in for a flurry of back shots followed by working over Hardy's knee some more. Edge tagged in as Hardy started to make a comeback so Edge raked the eyes and got the advantage, but fell victim to the Whisper In The Wind. Carlito then made the first hot tag...well, kind of...and took down everyone in a way only the apathetic Carlito could. In a great spot though, Carlito went for the springboard back elbow, but Edge held the rope down and Carlito landed hard on the outside. Back in the ring, Orton started stomping on Carlito something fierce and dragged him back to the corner so I guess this is the real face-in-peril here. Edge started to work on Carlito's knee so Carlito and Hardy can have matching knee braces later on. Carlito powered out of the hold by slamming his leg hard on Edge, but Nitro hopped in and mounted the cool one for more punches. Nitro then hung Carlito up on the bottom rope and Edge, trying to get people into the match, hung him up with a nice leg drop. Didn't work as nobody gave two shits about this match and I think they were chanting about the Mets and Yankees at this point. I really enjoyed the match, but the crowd was definitely making it a lot worse.
Nitro, in the ring, slapped on a quick rear naked choke on Carlito with John Cena yelling at him to fight and not quit. They have done a great job of protecting Cena in this match so far. Carlito fired back and finally hit his back elbow to get to Cena in the corner, who came out to one of the biggest reactions I've heard in a long time in both good & bad ways. Cena laid out Nitro and then Edge in a similar fashion, but as he went for the Five Knuckle Shuffle, he almost walked into the RKO, but was saved by Carlito's back cracker to Orton. Hardy then nailed the Swanton Bomb to take out Orton as Edge charged at Cena with the spear, but Cena went for the FU. Nitro pulled Edge off causing Cena to pull Nitro up and nail the FU to the cocky rookie and then lock in the STFU for the win. For a TV match, this was pretty damn good and easily one of the best RAW matches I've seen in a long time. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing though.
Winner: Jeff Hardy, Carlito, & John Cena
Star Wrestler: Edge
I enjoyed this match really a lot more than I should have and while it was mostly a collective effort from six guys who WWE probably hops will carry the company into the next decade, I got to give this one to Edge. He was trying so hard to get the crowd into it and his exchanges with Cena were great for building up the TLC match in my opinion. Of course, it wasn't Edge's best effort, but Edge in 2006 has been amazing and it shows even in a TV match.
The faces then stood tall as Edge and Cena exchange death looks and they hype up Trish's last match on RAW against Mickie as well as the main event of Vince McMahon and Triple H which I almost find myself dreading.
Commercial break number six has myself surprised that RAW has actually had some rather enjoyable wrestling for a change. I guess dropping your standards really does help making WWE more enjoyable.
For the third HIAC video, we got the ending of Triple H Vs. Chris Jericho from Judgment Day 2002 which was definitely a match that didn't deliver what I expected. I Still good though and will definitely beat this new HIAC. I wonder if they'll ever reference the Shawn Michaels and Triple H one or do they just expect us to forget the hour we all almost spent watching it. Don't get me wrong, it was a great match, but I don't see how they expect us to forget it. They then showed Anthony Michael Hall from the Dead Zone on USA in the crowd. I'm sorry if you like that show, but I can't stand it. It's easily better than Pysch though.
Uh-oh. Parental Advisory time so I guess it's another Cryme Tyme vignette trying to re-create some Los Guerreros magic. This one was basically an "endurance training" video with a white guy making a wrong turn into an alley looking for a Starbucks (best line: "I think I'm in da hood!") but finding his way into Shad Gaspard and JTG, formerly known as the Neighborhoodie. The white guy saw the guy no one in OVW could carry to a good match following him and he started to run, but fell victim to JTG's version of the Pounce which I have to say looked a lot better than Monty Brown's. The duo that will probably be champions by November then started to stomp a mud hole on the poor white guy and stole his wallet, which slowed him down according to our narrator. The narrator said some dumb catchphrases while the duo celebrated their hard earned money and that was it. The only thing worse than these segments will be when the two get into the ring. Trust me on that one. JTG is easily the best of the team though based on what I've seen in OVW, but that's really not saying much. I can not even begin to expect how horrible their debut match will be.
Vince McMahon then popped up on the screen saying how it's going to be a glorious night for the McMahon family and this triumph of his will be passed down to his grandchildren. He then said Shane will be proud as well as Stephanie, but after a double take, concedes she might have mixed feelings. I wonder how much longer they'll continue the game of "Everyone knows, but we are still keeping it kayfabed?" He then said he'll continue the legacy of his grandfather Jess and his father Vincent J. and this will be one of the most memorable matches in MSG history. Shane piped in saying how it will beat Ali, the Knicks, and the Rangers combined and Vince agreed except saying that he's a winner unlike them. Just another typical McMahon segment here. Thank god it didn't last long.
Commercial break number seven has thirty minutes left which probably means two more McMahon segments before the show's up, not counting the match.
The WWE Slam Of The Week was then shown being Super Crazy beating Chris Masters in a big upset, unless you realize that Masters sans muscle mass has nothing to offer WWE whatsoever.
Chris Masters Vs. Super Crazy
This was pretty bad. Crazy hopped in and Masters attacked him from the start by mostly slugging him in the back. Masters picked him up for a scoop slam that Crazy wiggled out of and then Crazy went for a wheel kick but was caught by Masters who slammed him down hard in a nice spot. That was perhaps one of the final times I may ever use the phrase "nice spot" to compliment Chris Masters. Oh, and it got no reaction whatsoever. Masters then posed for the crowd to show us just how much muscle mass he dropped and then he started slugging Crazy down on the mat. Crazy then tried to come back, but Masters kept him down and locked in a rear chin lock. Crazy battled out of the rest hold and hit a cross body off of an Irish whip into the corner for a two count. Crazy then hit a hard chop and kick, but Masters responded with a shoulder thrust in the corner and then a splash into the other after an Irish whip. Crazy ducked a corner clothesline then and hit a drop toe hold followed by a delayed springboard kick which looked great, though the crowd could care less again. Crazy then nailed a dropkick from the top and a standing moonsault for a two count and then countered an Irish whip, but Masters caught him and went for a powerbomb. Crazy arm dragged Masters out of this one and then used his speed to catch Masters for the win as Masters countered a head scissors, but Crazy spun around into the sunset flip for the win. It definitely picked up in the final moments of the match thanks to Crazy flying around the ring, but it was still pretty bad for getting no reaction and having Chris Masters.
Winner: Super Crazy
Star Wrestler: Super Crazy
Yeah, I don't think I need to explain this one.
WWE then turned on another video packed of The Marine. This one was showing John Cena & Robert Patrick talking about the movie. Robert Patrick being in this movie definitely picks it up a lot, but I still doubt it will be noteworthy or something anyone should really see unless you really love John Cena, you really love Robert Patrick, or you get free tickets. After the video, we saw Trish gearing up for her last RAW match ever and King and JR try to portray it as a big deal, which it really is but I doubt the crowd thinks so. Still kind of weird to think Trish will be gone soon as will a lot of other WWE stars apparently.
Commercial break number eight has me contemplating just how much WWE will try and spin it when The Marine does worse than See No Evil.
SmackDown! Rebound played coming back from break which just recapped the King Booker and Batista match. I didn't see it and while I have no doubt it was better than their Summerslam match, it's still not something I care to watch. Booker retaining and Finlay gearing up to feud with Batista definitely appeals to me though for some reason. Maybe it's cause Booker Vs. Lashley and Batista Vs. Finlay are both miles better matches than Booker Vs. Batista. Afterwards, they showed Toby Keith in the audience. They try harder and harder to make it seem like "cool" people care about and watch WWE. Why don't you just deliver a good product and the rest will follow?
Mickie James Vs. Trish Stratus
Trish is wearing a swank belt that reminds me of Darrin Corbin and his belt from CHIKARA & IWA-MS. It's just a side scrolling belt and hers reads "100% Stratusfaction." What else would it read? Anyway, for the amount of time this was given, it was pretty good and probably one of the better Diva matches in RAW history which isn't saying much, but still. Mickie and Trish started it off nicely with Mickie getting the arm of Trish, Trish countering out of it into a cover, and Mickie sliding out of the cover & hitting an Oklahoma roll for a quick count. Trish then locked in a side headlock and then came off an Irish whip with her Lou Thesz press. Mickie then ended up on the top rope and Trish went for her handstand head scissors only for Mickie to push her off and hit a hurricanrana. The two then nailed each other with a big double clothesline and then Mickie hit a nice, hard, & low dropkick to the face of Trish and then she went up top again only to fall to Trish's handstand head scissors. If at first you don't succeed, I guess. They exchanged blows in the middle of the ring until Trish hit her rotating handstand head scissors. How many variations does she have of that? Trish then missed the chick kick and was rolled up for a big nearfall, but Trish then got Mickie and went for the Stratusfaction. Lita jumped on the apron though and distracted her almost allowing Mickie to hit her Tornado DDT, but Trish countered again and hit the Stratusfaction off of Lita's face to win her last RAW match ever.
Winner: Trish Stratus
Star Wrestler: Mickie James
Yes, she's retiring and she is one of the best, if not the best, American women workers ever, but I couldn't give this one to Trish. This was all Mickie here and Trish was just along for the ride and the win to leave RAW on a high note.
After the match, Trish posed for the crowd and then Mickie and Trish embraced in the middle of the ring as JR calls her a future Hall Of Famer. I don't see why she wouldn't be in the Hall Of Fame of WWE at all, but the question comes up as to when she would go in. I guess it all depends on how she talks about WWE in interviews after she leaves. The crowd reaction got up a bit more as she posed some more and I think it hit them as she got on the mike that this was it for her, but it was still a filler reaction for such a big star leaving. Trish got teary eyed as a small "Thank you, Trish" chant broke out and Trish thanked them for coming on this amazing ride. I think she had more to say, but was too emotional so she put the mike down, posed some more, and ended her last RAW appearance on a very triumphant and somber note. We'll miss you, Trish. Not much else to say besides that. I can't even begin to fathom what the Women's Division is going to be like in the near future.
Before we head to commercial, they showed another HIAC video, this time of Triple H going up against Kevin Nash from Bad Blood 2003 in the Home Improvement HIAC match. God, I hated that match. Triple H in 2003 was pretty bad on all ends, in my opinion, save maybe three or four matches, and this match was just the shining example of it. Of course, it didn't help that he spent a lot of time with Steiner, Nash, and Goldberg this year, but still. I'd say Cena's on par with all of their skill from that year and Triple H carried him well this year. Anyway, they pumped up the main event again and then we head to another break.
Commercial break number nine sees Trish leave RAW on a high note. Seriously, I don't think they're ready to put Melina in the division yet so what the hell's going to happen? They need to bring back Molly Holly and Ivory bad.
This Week In Wrestling History this week was basically another tribute to 9/11 as they talked about WWE SmackDown! from Houston on September 13, 2001, two days after the tragedy of 9/11. It was the first public gathering of its kind and I definitely remember all of it (though not Stephanie McMahon's controversial comments for some reason) and probably will for a while, despite the Invasion being looked down upon so much. I think I have it on a tape somewhere too. Hmm, might watch that after this is over. After that, JR talked about being there some more and they played up to it being five years later some more. Still can't believe that much time has gone by. They then ran down the card for Unforgiven which is Edge Vs. John Cena, Kane Vs. Umaga, Highlanders Vs. Spirit Squad, Carlito Vs. Randy Orton, Lita Vs. Trish Stratus, Johnny Nitro Vs. Jeff Hardy, and of course, McMahons & Big Show Vs. D-Generation X. The card does look pretty stacked, but I still am completely apathetic towards the HIAC match.
DX was then shown walking backstage and they ran into Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch who asked where they were going with Triple H responding that they're going through them. They all started to brawl from here and then Shane ran in and they started to triple team Triple H and threw him into a limo window as Big Show took Shawn Michaels and cobra clutch slammed him onto the hood and roof of the limo. Vince then showed up and they slammed the door right on Triple H's ear as Murdoch screamed he's nothing. Triple H then fell down and was bleeding from the ear as JR tried to sell it like death. Vince then said it looks like he's bleeding and that's great cause their match is a No Holds Barred match. I don't really understand why the two are related, but ok. Vince then thanked the rednecks for their help and then told them to make sure he gets to the ring.
Commercial break number tens means this show is almost over. Sadly, the wrestling was pretty good on the show, but nothing else has grabbed my interest and the crowd is definitely turning me off as they could care less. Plus, there's still Vince and Triple H to go.
No Holds Barred
Vince McMahon Vs. Triple H
This was better than I expected, but still not good. To start it off, a bloated Vince in a bright red tank top sauntered his way down to the ring. That should have been the indication that we would not be getting any kind of classic tonight. Triple H, led by Shane McMahon, then came out bleeding from the ear and dangling all over the place trying to sell his equilibrium being off because of his ear. A lot of times in the match, he overdid it and acted more like he was drunk (kind of like Carlito earlier), but he had his moments and it's not like it's something you see every week so it's not like people had much to compare it to. Triple H missed a clothesline early and Vince laid in with some nice/bad right punches to the ear. I say nice because it was good strategy, but those were some pretty bad looking punches he was throwing. He then hit some headbutts to the ear which was a lot better and slammed Triple H's ear into the turnbuckle corner. Vince then kicked Triple H right in the stomach and choked him out with his belt. As Vince stood tall over Triple H, a small HBK chant broke out so Vince hit some more good/bad punches which were getting worse and worse. Vince then took Triple H on the outside and slammed him ear-first into the steel post and the crowd literally could care less. Triple H made his way to his feet in the ring long enough to give the Suck It! taunt to Vince for a big pop (the first probably since Cena made the hot tag). Vince got pissed and hit the Pedigree onto his son-in-law for a nearfall. It didn't get much of a response though it probably would have killed at another time.
Triple H then hulked up I guess to "stick it to Hogan" again like he supposedly did at Summerslam. Sadly, I must say Triple H did it better than Hogan could now, but I hate Hogan so that's a big conflict of interest or whatever you want to say. Triple H hit a big spinebuster to the roar of the crowd and then took out Shane who jumped on the apron. He then went for the Pedigree, but Shane hopped in and nailed Triple H on the back. Vince and Shane then worked over him and Shane grabbed a chair, but a hurt Shawn Michaels made his way into the ring and took out Shane with his normal comeback routine. Big Show then came out and Shawn jumped on him, but Show caught him and laid him out with a big powerbomb in the middle of the ring. Triple H then mustered up some strength and made it into the ring with a sledgehammer, but the three of them took him out and Shane then lined up Shawn for a stiff chair shot. They went to do the same on Triple H, but Vince had a better idea and laid out Triple H with a sledgehammer shot in the ear for the win. It really wasn't that bad, but if you had seen those punches and realized that they could have cut three minutes from this and still been fine, it definitely makes your opinion of the match drop a lot.
Winner: Vince McMahon
Star Wrestler: Triple H
Those punches were pretty bad and I got to give props to Triple H for having the balls to blade his ear. Those things can cause all sorts of trouble if you do it wrong, but all that blood definitely picked up the match and told somewhat of a "story." I shudder to think what the match would have been like without the blood and ear injury.
To cap off the night, Vince McMahon stood tall for the first time in MSG history as they showed all the highlights of the match and left the people watching at home wanting to see DX get revenge on the McMahons at Unforgiven. Of course, that's the desired effect. Only the buyrates will tell if it works out and I think they will be good because, look at it, it's TLC, Hell In A Cell, and Trish's last match. Well, not so sure how many people care about the last one, but you've still got the first two!
This was a pretty good and a pretty bad RAW show, folks. I enjoyed most of the wrestling on the show with the exception of the horrible McMahon punches and Chris Masters. There were mostly bad segments with a good Piper and Edge one. Ugh, I just remembered the piece of shit that was the middle school fight between Hardy and Nitro. God, it's going to take me a while to block that out. Anyway, the one thing constant throughout the show was that, while this was the first show in Madison Square Garden in a long time, the crowd could really have cared less except for John Cena, which was only to show their respective opinions about him, not really what he did in the show. While it's great that they can get such a big crowd with just that selling point, it doesn't bode well for the future at all as well as the next time they run the arena. Time will tell as always though, and while I enjoyed this week's RAW on the whole (mostly due to the first hour), I must say that it doesn't really do much to build confidence in WWE having a solid product. One bigger constant is that WWE has such a great production team and a great lead commentator in JR for as much as the crowd didn't care for the show (and crowds can and often do kill matches and whole shows), the show still came off very well especially in the somber Trish segment that didn't have many people caring. So overall, I'd say it was a decent RAW with the first hour being pretty damn good and the second hour dropping off. Who knows what next week will be like though?
Well, that's it for this review. Coming up next (hopefully in the next couple of hours) will be ECW from 9/12 followed by EPW TV from 9/13 (maybe), TNA iMPACT! from 9/14 (definitely), WWE SmackDown! & Heat from 9/15 (definitely), DSW TV from 9/17 (maybe), and WWE Unforgiven. Of course, I'll be throwing in some DVD & game reviews as well soon so just keep a look out. Oh, I need to plug this before I forget and I'd love it if all of you reading this would take the time to check it out. My site has it's annual Hall Of Fame voting up right now and it's literally one of the very few, if the only, Hall Of Fames out there that is completely decided by fan votes! There's a ballot of three women workers, six tag teams, six personalities & promoters, and fifteen male workers up right now and to vote, all you do is pick two, four, four, and ten of those respective groups! For all the information on how to vote as well as to just vote period, just click here now. Thanks! Well, that's going to wrap up everything and it's time for me to get started on ECW. 'Till next time, this is "Squared Circle Reviews" signing off and hoping you enjoy what you watch, as long as it's not a middle school shoving fight.
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